Saturday, December 4, 2010

Ninjas. Damn...

Ninjas make everything better. It's a proven scientific fact. Whether it be dinner with the in-laws, church, political debates, or lack-luster blogs the addition of Ninjas can improve the enjoyment level by over 9000%. That said, movies that have Ninjas in them tend to be rather enjoyable for action fans all over. The most recent addition to the Ninja movie universe is The Warrior's Way directed and written by Sngmoo Lee (Don't ask me to pronounce it).

Before I get into it, yes I realize this is not the Gunpla review I promised back in oh..say, June. I've decided to finish up the current models I have now before I start taking pictures of them and such for the reviews. It might be a bit longer till they appear but I have not forgotten about them.

ANYWAYS! The Warrior's Way is actually billed as a "Western" genre movie. I find that hilarious because seeing Katanas swinging and Ninjas jumping all over the place in a genre that is usually filled with cliff-top stake outs and gunfights with Ind-...Native completely new to me. And come on, who didn't ever wonder what would happen if Cowboys fought Ninjas?

The movie starts out in what I assume is Japan though it's never confirmed (it's definitely Japan, why would it be anywhere else?). A narration explains the origins of "The Warrior" as I've dubbed him and his life goal of being "The greatest swordsman who ever lived. Ever." Yes, the second ever appears right below the title as it appears on-screen. The opening fight is between The Warrior and the rival clan to his to which The Warrior defeats in a very anime-like "super fast one slice that's an instakill" fashion. He comes across the final living member of the rival clan...a baby girl. At that point The Warrior has a change of heart and not only spared the life of but "adopts" the baby girl. Clearly disobeying his orders and now a wanted man, he flees Japan and heads to America.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, WHOA! Hold up! Ninjas didn't exist anymore when America was around! Especially since this movie seems to take place in the 1800s! Yes, that is true. I didn't mention this earlier but if your looking for historical or realistic accuracy then your looking at the wrong movie. It's only a fictional, fantasy story with no intention of being "accurate". But that's OK with me! Back to the plot.

After settling down to a new peaceful life in a ghost town with a population filled of circus rejects, The Warriors past soon catches up to him. After already defending the town from a rouge platoon of outlaws, The Warriors old clan tracks him down to the ghost town and draws their swords against The Warrior, the baby girl, and just about everyone else in the town.

Yeah! That's all I'm gonna say about the plot! I'm not actually gonna spoil all the good stuff! But there definitely is some good stuff in this movie. First off, the action. It's everything you'd expect from sword fights to gunfights and every combination of the two that can be made in the 1800s. And nothing is spared in the deaths of people. At one point an outlaw holding a machine gun gets his hands chopped off and the gun continues to fire while turning around and killing everyone standing next to the outlaw. An awesome amount of gore is present but its not COMPLETELY over the top. Hey, if someones gonna get hacked up by a katana, its gonna be messy, and this movie shows that. Special effects wise its certainly no Avatar. Most of the explosions are clearly CGI and the whole movie seemed to be filmed on green screens and sets which gives it this artsy looking but slightly unbelievable atmosphere. In its defense though, it's a refreshing change from the super-gritty realism of most action movies nowadays.

But this movie isn't all straight action. To be honest, the action doesn't even start till about 2/3 through the movie. The rest of the movie is the psudo-love story between The Warrior and a woman living in the town called Lynne. Is it boring? Yeah, to a degree. But it's filled with little bits of small humor so you don't fall asleep.XD Dong-gun Jang, who plays The Warrior gives off a very serious Jackie Chan feel to the character. Through very few lines he made The Warrior a likable character and couldn't wait to see him kick ass every time he grabbed a blade. Although not pushed in the commercials for the movie, there was one actor who really caught my eye. That would be none other than Kate Bosworth. In the words of the great Scooter: "SMOKIN JESUS TITTY CINNAMON" is she GORGEOUS! And even more so as a red head! She ends up being the psudo-lover/apprentice to The Warrior as he teaches her how to use the sword. Which comes in handy at the end of the movie.

In the end, there's nothing super spectacular about The Warrior's Way(Except for a red-headed Kate Bosworth in a corset ^_^). But it should not be dismissed as just another Ninja movie. There is a anime like feel to it all and a great presentation of action. Don't see this movie for the acting, or the story, or any of that. But if you need a movie that is just absolute chaos with cowboys and Ninjas, check it out!

Well, it's not TOO bad for a first movie review...I'd like to see someone else try to do it...I look forward to your letters :) Until next time...see you starside.

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